Monday, July 18, 2011

The Solutions of Child Abuse

As an individual, you have the right to stop child abuse and neglect. Start by:

  • Understanding the problem. Child abuse and neglect may occur in any children. In 2001, reports have shown that an estimated 903,000 children nationwide were victims of maltreatment. These are just reported cases; experts believe that actual number of abuse and neglect are more numerous than statistics indicate.

  • Understanding the terms. There are many forms of child abuse. Such as physical abuse, emotional neglect, sexual abuse, and emotional abuse. Usually more than one type of abuse or neglect occurs within families.

  • Understanding the causes. Most parents don't intend to hurt or neglect their children. Many were abused or neglected themselves. Young or inexperienced parents might have difficulties in taking care of their babies or what they can expect from children at different stages of growth. Poverty, divoice, sickness, disability may sometimes lead parents to take a toll on their child. Parents with alcohol or drug problems are more likely to cause maltreatment to their children.

  • Support programs that support families. Parent education, community centers, respite care services, and substance abuse treatment programs help to protect children by addressing circumstances that place families at risk for child abuse and neglect.
  • Report suspected abuse and neglect. By doing so, you may save a child from a life long torture. Call the police if you suspect a child is being maltreated or neglected.
  • Spread the word. Help educate others about child abuse and neglect. Organize campaigns to help spread the word. Create broachers or post ads online to create awareness of child abuse.
  • Strengthen the fabric of your community. Get to know your neighbors their children. Volunteer to help stressed parents to watch their children while they take a break. Activities that strengthen communities, for example, service to civic clubs and participation on boards and committees, may ultimately contribute to the well-being of children.
  • Be ready in an emergency. If we witnessed scenarios of a child is being, or is about to be, physically or verbally abused, we can try to talk to the adult to get their attention away from the child. Say something like, "Children can really wear you out, can't they?" or "My child has done the same thing." Or you can ask if you can help in any way. If you see a child in a public place unattended, stay with the child until the parent returns.
  • Prevention begins at home. A parent must take some time to re-evaluate their parenting skills. They must be honest with themselves. For example, do they yell at their children? Do they hit them? Do they enjoy being a parent at least most of the time?

Communication and educating our children are the important in preventing any abuse. Unconditional love and acceptance are very important for every child. With this foundation, we can make a difference and stop child abuse all over the world.


Studies indicate children are exposed to serious abuse and neglect leading to physical and psychological injury and serious long-term consequences everyday. Researchers are still examining the wide range of potential consequences of child abuse and neglect. Evidence suggests that abuse is associated with problems manifested in adolescence and adulthood. Child abuse is a long-term crisis in a child’s life. Even though children are removed from violent homes, the effects of experiencing abuse in their childhood will hunt them through their entire life. Child abuse will affect every aspects of a child’s life and can affect their adult life as well.

Children acquire respect and protection from adults who take them seriously, love and help them to become a healthy, happy adult. Most children received the proper treatment and grew up with love and care, but the children who were abused, neglected and used by adults weren’t as lucky.

Oftentimes, children who are younger, preschool and kindergarten, do not know that they were abused, they tend to believe that what they done must have been wrong. They would become self-blame and precipitate feelings of guilt, anxiety and worry. Therefore, they would not and could not express their feelings verbally hence becoming more withdrawn, non-verbal and would whine and tend to cling. Problems such as eating and sleeping difficulties, concentration problems, generalized anxieties and physical complaints such as headaches would occur occasionally too.

To pre-adolescent child, they have a better ability to externalize negative emotions and are more verbalize. Symptoms commonly seen with childhood anxiety such as sleeping problems, eating disturbance and nightmares, pre-adolescent victims may show loss of interest in social activities, they have low self-concept and are often withdrawal or avoidance of peer relations. Some are rebelliousness and have oppositional-defiant behaviors in the school setting. Temper tantrums are also common, along with irritability, frequent fighting at school or between siblings, treating pets cruelly, lashing out at objects, or abusively, threatening of peers or siblings with violence and they would attempt to gain attention through abuse, for instance, hitting, kicking, or choking peers and/or family members.


A child’s mind may permanently alter the psychological well being of an abused child. Following maltreatment, children are known to display:

· Repetitive nightmares.

· Anxiety.

· High levels of anger issues and aggression.

· Feelings of guilt and shame, but for sexually abused victims, this can be quite severe if the victim experienced some degree of pleasure during the abuse.

· Sudden phobias, such as fear of darkness or water.

· Psychosomatic complaints, including stomachaches, headaches, hypochondriasis, bed wetting, faecal soiling, and excessive blinking.

· General fearfulness

· Specific fear of others of the same gender as the abuser.

· Depression, social withdrawal and long bouts of sadness.

· Self-reported social isolation

· Feelings of stigmatization.

After continued exposure to maltreatment, the abused child may develop further psychological complications:

· An increase of psychiatric disorders.

· Dissociation, intrusive thoughts, suicidal ideation

· More acute phobias.

· More serious levels of anxiety, fear, depression, loneliness, anger, hostility and guilt.

· Distorted cognition, such as chronic perceptions of danger and confusion.

· Illogical thinking, inaccurate images of the world and shattered assumptions about the world.

· Difficulty in determining what is real.

· Decreased effectiveness in comprehending complex roles.

While physical injuries, such as bruises, scars, and broken bones, may be visually obvious, abuse is also related to several additional mental complications. This includes:
• Children that suffered serious and chronic neglect are likely smaller and lighter than normal children, it has been shown to affect the child’s long-term health.
• Children that are physically abused may suffer permanent neurological damage; it may affect their future development.
• Eating disorders.
• Sleep disturbances and dizziness when awake.
• Gastrointestinal problems, migraine headaches, difficulty breathing, hypertension, aches, pains and rashes which may defy diagnosis and/or treatment.
• Poor health.


Abused children are known to display:
• Developmental delays.
• Clinging behavior, extreme shyness and fear of strangers.
• Troubled socialization with peers – it may lead to constant fighting or socially undesirable behaviors, such as bullying, teasing or not sharing.
• Bad school adjustment and disruptive classroom behavior.

A victim of child abuse is more likely to be associated with a host of behavioral problems that will affect themselves during their adolescence period.

• Teen pregnancy.
• Self-destructive behaviors such as self-mutilation or burning.
• Truancy and running away behavior.
• Delinquency and prostitution.
• Use of drugs/alcohol and substance abuse/dependence.
• Eating disorders like anorexia, bulimia or obesity – most likely on female victims.
• Suicide or suicide attempts.

Evidence suggests that many of these problems may continue into the child’s adulthood and become ingrained patterns of behavior. It is believed that these children and youth develop such behaviors to cope with the trauma of being abused and neglected. These behaviors eventually become self-destructive and are usually extremely difficult to erase.


A child’s school performance may be effected when the child is a victim of abuse as it is one of the most destructive consequences. Research indicates that abused children’s intellectual function and performance in school are reduced. It may also lead to long-term consequences. Victims with academic failure have been associated with antisocial behavior and therefore, quitting school. These behaviors in turn would increase the risk of decreased productivity to the victim, long-term economic dependence and less satisfaction with life as adults.

Victims may display:
• Lower schools performance test scores and lower language, reading and math scores.
• Grade repetitions, disciplinary referrals and multiple suspensions.
• Below average working and learning levels.
• Weaker orientation to future educational goals and vocational compared to normal children.

It is rational that child abused victims will perform poorly in school because not only do they have to face the complications of a violent home life, but neglectful and abusive parents are less likely to provide an intellectually stimulating environment for the child or read to the child, supervise the child’s school works and are less likely to get involved in their child’s academic life.


Generally, abuse may affect a child’s concept of sexuality. It will cause the child to reduce his/her ability to set an appropriate boundary and often instills a fear or negative perception of sex. Even though the majority of sexual consequences are the result of sexual abuse, some forms of maltreatment can also be sexually destructive. For instance, a neglected child may seek sexual intimacy very early in life to cope with the neglect of his/her parents. This creates risk for teenage pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases to the child. Major sexual consequences of maltreatment such as:
• Engaging in open or excessive masturbation, sexual curiosity and frequent exposure of the genitals.
• Simulated sexual acts with siblings and friends, inappropriate sexual behavior, such as breast or genitals.
• Premature sexual knowledge of sexualized kissing in friendships and with parents.

Following in adolescence years and adulthood, the victims will continue to display sexually maladaptive behavior:
• Orgasmic disorders and painful intercourse.
• Promiscuity.
• Dissatisfaction with sex and negative attitudes.
These problems are usually the result of sexual component from a parent-child relationship, which affected the child’s sense of sexuality and intimacy. A of sexual abuse can have difficulty in distinguishing a sexual and a non-sexual relationship and therefore introduce a sexual element into all relationships.


Child abuse can interfere a person’s ability to develop appropriate and meaningful relationships from childhood to adulthood. Victims are consistently being rated by their peers as displaying socially undesirable behaviors. Children displaying multiple psychological and behavioral problems would often have difficulty in developing and maintaining healthy relationships. Victimization reduces social competence and limits empathic ability that is necessary to establish a satisfying relationship with others. Maltreated children have been known to display the following interpersonal problems:
• Insecure relationships with parents and caregivers.
• Loss of close friends.
• No trust in others.
• Relationship problems, such as overly sexual or conflicted relationships.
• Dissatisfaction with adult relationships and fear of intimacy.


Parental abuse, without a doubt, affects the child’s confidence and self-esteem. Parents maltreating their child will most likely lead the child to develop the sense of unworthiness. Maltreatment may cause a child to distort or have negative self-images throughout his/her life. Maltreated victims will view themselves as bad, worthless or unlovable and may develop problems such as:
• Low self-esteem.
• Feelings of being out of control.
• Inaccurate body images that will lead to eating disorders.
• Extreme sense of guilt for the abuse.
• Impairment of a cohesive sense of identity.
• Self-disgust, self-denigration, self-hatred.


Often child abused victims report having lost their sense of faith, not only religious belief but also faith in themselves and everyone around them. It is common for victims to display lack of spirit and faith. Moreover, when a victim reaches adulthood, they would show lack of interest and participation in organized religion. Any forms of abuse or neglect would destroy a child’s spirit or enthusiasm for the rest of his/her life.


Victims of child abuse would often become violent themselves toward their own children and in intimate relationships. Studies shown that one third of all victims grow up to continue the same pattern that they were treated: one third do not; and one-third remain vulnerable to the effects of child abuse depending upon the social stressors in their life.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

What should I do now?

SPM is over now and I'm like seriously BOREEEEEEED!

Came back to the Genting and KL trip already... Time flies, doesn't it?

The trip was........................... Ok it was not that great.... Going with cousins were fun and all, but not THAT fun... It had mostly to do with all of us wanting to have our own fun, which is all different... There's A's nerdy fun, and B's girly fun, and C's gamer fun... DIFFERENT THINGS!

And there's like less than 30 people in the trip... 27 people? I didn't pay that much attention... xD

I won't comments about the people in this trip mainly because they're all totally different and also because I didn't get the chance to know them that much...

And now, school for the schoolers has begun and I still don't know what I should do... Ok I know what I should do but I don't know how to do it....

I'm gonna stop typing now because I'm gonna go practice driving...heeeeee~ XP

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

November 17th

All the girls around me say I've changed... My mum, my sister, my best friends...

It hurts a lot that it they didnt cared to tell me what was wrong and ignored me... I don't like being unhappy... Who does?

Arghhh! Ya so what if I've mixed with a few guys... They're sweet and fun to be with! There's nothing wrong with that!

Things are so complicated right now that I don't know what to do... SPM's just around the corner and I don't have time to deal with this!

Friday, November 5, 2010


Looks like Graduation day is over... And so is the year-long-practice dance...

SPM is just 18 days away... Fingers crossed!

I hope I could achieve my goals soon! Time is running out!

Sunday, October 17, 2010

October 18

It's been long since I've updated this ancient thing... No comment on life what so ever... Graduation is this Saturday and so is the school's performance. Fingers crossed and hope everything goes perfectly well! After this I think I'll have to start studying for SPM...

Once SPM is over, I'll need to reinvent myself completely and start everything from scratch again in College. I'll be stuck in Penang thought... I feel like I've changed into something I myself couldn't even control.

I'll pray everyday hoping tomorrow will be a happy day.


Thursday, August 26, 2010


Damn, we're running out of time for everything... Class Item's clothes, make-up, dance timing... It's all a mess!

I want to do well my part especially my solo part but I can't seem to get it right like the the original!!! I know most people won't notice but I want to be at my best!

Anyways, got my driver's license a month ago and was too lazy to blog about it...

My feelings for anyone, and I really mean it this time, are gone now and I intend to stay that way until I graduate... from College.

I feel betrayed by a certain idiot who is too stupid to realise that she's an idiot. So I want to do something that will SHOW her that she's an idiot. Hopefully I'll get my chance if Fate wants me to...

Bored. Gonna read other people's blogs...zzz

Friday, July 16, 2010


So many nerve racking events have happened this year already even thought it's just July. I don't wanna talk about much but there's one thing that's been bugging... whenever I look at her, I still feel so good, especially when she's looking back at me... It's like looking at an angel... I know it's been like, a year+ since I've met you and loved you for who you are even though it kills me, tearing me to shreds and stabbing me in the heart. You're the only one who's made me feel this way and I just don't want to lose you. As a friend.

Sucks that you don't even care and don't even have the slightest idea of what I'm feeling. You said you want someone to love you for who you are, but you don't even know that I love you for who you are, and I can tell you that it hurts, but I don't care.

I've used excuse to lie to myself saying that I've moved on, but using other guys to forget about you only worked a little.

You're not going to read this anyway. You only have HER in your eyes. But I don't care. Because you won't know and I'll act like nothing happened. And I'm officially shutting myself out. My pride and dignity has been shattered by unwanted comments from my relatives. They don't know how it feels and I can't explain it to them because they would still say that I was wrong. This is why I don't like talking to them. They don't get it and won't listen and still say hurtful unnecessary rants.

Thanks for hurting my pride, dignity and emotions. I've officially want to sleep and never wake up.

Friday, June 11, 2010

1 week of holiday left...

1 week of my holiday is gone... ==... Going to my grandma's funeral a whole week... haiz... I thought this holiday would be special, maybe getting to hang out with friends, or jam with the band or finish my videos, but guess not... I've lost the chance to hang out with friends and jam with the band when I'm at my grandma's funeral... Call me disrespectful but I really need the fun to get over the pain... I'm so moody right now, really feel like crying everything out, but that'll just remind me of how angry I am.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Grandma passed away....

Grandma passed away the day before my first band performance... mum said it's best for me to not go but she let me go anyways because she knows that it's what I've been practicing so hard for...

Anyways, I've had a great time practicing with our band and not to mention made new great friends... they were so friendly and talented! With their supports and guidance, we've improved so much... And they've opened my eyes to a life I've always dreamed to have... I hope to hang out with them, all of them...again... =D

Thursday, May 27, 2010


Suck like hell! This is the worst day EVER! I've finally seen you're true form! No wonder people hate you! Now I'm starting to dislike you! Ughhh!!!